A month of taking care of my momma and daddy. Researching. Crying. Dreading. Laying awake at night.
Well, here is an update on my Momma.
Because of my Mom's age and her being a diabetic, Mom has decided to not try to get on the transplant list. Realistically, she would not have much chance of actually getting one. And Mom decided she would rather any liver that could go to her be given to someone who was younger.
So what does this mean?
Well, it means time with my mom is limited. Momma and Daddy have chosen to bring Hospice in & have them help us keep mom comfortable at home. A nurse comes twice a week and checks on her, and will come out if we have any concerns. She is on morphine around the clock, and has to take a ton of pills/liquids to try and help keep her ammonia levels down.
As far as time - we don't know for sure. Her doctor has said that most likely she will be gone or be in a nonfunctional state by Christmas. I pray this is not true. But she is already showing signs that her body is tired of fighting and she is showing a resistance to the treatments that are available.
I am staying with my Mom and Dad around the clock now. My dad has Dementia and is not able to handle all of the medicines that my mom is required to take. Personally, I don't mind being there. I love soaking up all the little moments with my Momma.
How am I doing? It's hard. It's hard planning your mom's funeral while she sits beside you. It's scary knowing that one morning, Dad and I will find my mom in a coma from the toxins that are building up in her body. Right now, we are focusing on one day at a time. It's hard explaining to our boys that Grammy's don't live forever.
Alex has been an absolute saint through all of this. He brings me breakfast on his way to work (at 5am, no less). He is keeping our home functioning: cleaning, doing laundry, paying bills. Tonight is the first time in a week I have been home and all he was worried about when I pulled in the drive was that I had a good meal in my belly and a hand for me to hold.
That's where we are at. There has not been much time for scrapbooking, but as my mom begins to sleep more and more (because of the toxins building up in her body) I plan on working on my PL right beside her.
Keep praying for my family. We know a miracle probably won't be coming. But we are praying for peace and for my mom to be pain free.